1.25.2007

Press Release 1.25.07

Kansas City, MO Presidential Candidate Randy Bohlender made the following statement on the steps of the Royal Order of the Gun Club international headquarters this morning.
Good morning! It's so wonderful to see so many of our friends gathered with us here this morning...people committed to making a mess like ourselves.

You all know that the road to the White House is a long and bumpy one. There are treacherous curves, high peaks, low valleys, and some really creepy rest stops. No one should travel these roads alone.

You also know that behind every great candidate, there is another individual. This individual works primarily in the background, negotiating with third world potentates, keeping the presidential Caddy waxed, and making crank calls to the Prime Minister of Canada. This individual is the Vice President, and is only one pretzel-choking incident away from the highest office in the land.

Many good names came to mind in discussing a running mate. Good arguments were made for a number of qualified individuals. When the discussion closed, however, one name stood head and shoulders above the rest.

I am proud to name Brent Steeno as my Vice Presidential candidate. Together, we can make a bigger mess than ever.

13 comments:

Greg Burnett said...

I think you should consider diversifying your cabinet selections for broader appeal.

AdamMac, Ft. Mill Gun Club President, would be a brilliant choice for Sec. of Defense, IMO. He would garner both the southern and the South African vote.

Tracie said...

this is way better that logging on to the foxnews updates every morning.
WAY BETTER!
we expect some really good perks for supporting your candidacy!

Anonymous said...

Mr. Steeno will definitely add a certain "Je nais se quois" to the Bohlender campaign. He has already done a great service to giant rabitdom by bringing their story before the people.

2008 will certainly be great!

P.S. When will campaign bumper stickers be available to the masses?

Anonymous said...

Also, I am a transcriptionist by profession and my aunt actually knew Rosemary Woods. So........if the President needs to have any "sensitive documents" typed, I'm happy to volunteer - I know how to dispose of the tapes! Of course, I use the word "volunteer" loosely. I believe Federal employment should include a substantial paycheck and benefits package. Don't you????!!???

In addition, I fully support Mr. Burnett's nomination of Mr. McArthur for Secretary of Defense. After all, he did institute, implement and organize the "Gun Club" in the southern United States. I know those constituents sleep better at night already knowing that he is in charge of such an important offshoot of the K.C. Gun Club.

Brent Steeno said...

am greatly honored to be the running mate of Randy Bohlender. At the beginning of this year I would have never thought I would be running for vice president of the United States of America.

I am also glad that we are ahead of the rest of potential future presidents. Clinton and many others announced this week their desire to run for the office of President but none of them announced their running mate. This is to our advantage.

Please go to my blog (steeno.wordpress.com) to read the transcript of my acceptance speech that will be delivered tomorrow morning during the 6-8am prayer meeting.

Anonymous said...

The president is coming to KC!
I bet he's going to meet you.

Randy Bohlender said...

Caleb...

I am unsure if our paths will cross today. I am very busy in meetings with Mr. Steeno, plotting strategy, calling supporters, and playing Linerider.org.

messes like ours just don't happen.

Randy

Brent Steeno said...

My Speech has been posted.

Brent Steeno said...

Caleb,

I regret to inform you that we will not be meeting with the President. In running for office we realize the integrity that is needed in our lives. We have sacred trust commitments today. If the President would like to meet later tonight, say around 10 I could make that meeting.

Brian said...

So, that's who has been making those calls!! The Prime Minister's Office is not happy, dude...

Anonymous said...

This is so exciting. I am hoping your campaign travels will bring you back to the fine state that you grew up in. I have shared your thoughts with a few of my family and co-workers and you do have votes here. The "mess" you will be creating will be worth it....what's the worst that could happen? is my thought...kyra

Anonymous said...

Dear Mr. Bohlender, This is Brent Steeno's mom (Chris). I am volunteering to be your campaign manager for the great State of Wisconsin. In Wisconsin we have a tradition of trading cigarette's for votes. (Presidential election of 2000 and again in 2004). Seeing I work at Amy's Candy Kitchen which produces the best carmel apples in the U.S., I thought we could trade apples for votes. "Together We All Can Make a Bigger Mess Than Ever."

Anonymous said...

Is Mr. Steeno from Wisconsin? If he's willing to campaign in a Buckey the Badger costume, he may be able to garner the University of Wisconsin Alumni voter block (My husband being one of them!)
Go Badgers!! Oh, I meant, Go Bohlender/Steeno!

P.S. If foam fingers work for Ohio, I think Cheesehead hats are just the thing for Wisconsin!