Thoughts on Blogs

Having looked at a few blogs in my day (I'm not exactly sure when my day was, but the phrase seems to lend a certain heft to any statement that follows, doesn't it? Oh. Sorry. I got distracted. Having looked at a few blogs in my day, I have come to the realization that most blogs (roughly 100 percent or more) fall neatly into one or more of the following categories.

One Post Wonder Blogs
You know the type. They post once and you wonder if they ever will post again. Weeks, months, even years go by with them telling people "Yes, I'm a blogger....", and technically they are, in the sense that Neil Armstrong is a resident of the moon. Interestingly, these are the people with the highest bpb stats (blogs per blogger) because they think that if they start a NEW blog, they'll write in that one more than they wrote in the old one. Sure you will, buddy.

Grocery List Blogs
These are the blogs in which people tell you things that 1) you did not need to know and b) were not even remotely curious about, such as their grocery list. I think they're trying to be reformed one post wonder bloggers. Feeling the pressure to blog, they post things like "Washed the dog today. Too tired to write anymore." I can only imagine, after writing that tome. You probably need a vacation.

Stream of Consciousness Blogs
These blogs can be quite interesting and are not categorized by their content so much as their author's tendency to write large posts that consistently are made up of run on sentences, leading you to wonder if they so much as took a breath between logging on and hitting the POST button, or if you will find them slumped over the keyboard from oxygen depravation, one leg twitching like a little yip yip dog anticipating the arrival of the new mailman, excited by the things that most people would be forced to admit is very, very mundane....rather than start a new sentence, they use the dot dot dot....a lot, you know?

Other
That's the other neat category. Other. Please, keep your blogs in this category. (Actually, there are several more but I'm out of time....and you're tired of reading. My stat meter records yawns-per-post).

And speaking of other blogs, please hear me as I voice the deepest disappointment of my recent blogging career - the fact that no one (with the exception of my wife) caught my off hand shout out to Sabrina Duncan a few posts ago.

Folks, that obscure little blog pearl is what keeps you coming back and I think you all missed it. I thought for sure he'd say something. Or this guy. Most of the rest are too young to have caught it I guess.

One more thing....looks like Al Gore is the new Tom Bodett.