Thoughts on Blogs

Having looked at a few blogs in my day (I'm not exactly sure when my day was, but the phrase seems to lend a certain heft to any statement that follows, doesn't it? Oh. Sorry. I got distracted. Having looked at a few blogs in my day, I have come to the realization that most blogs (roughly 100 percent or more) fall neatly into one or more of the following categories.

One Post Wonder Blogs
You know the type. They post once and you wonder if they ever will post again. Weeks, months, even years go by with them telling people "Yes, I'm a blogger....", and technically they are, in the sense that Neil Armstrong is a resident of the moon. Interestingly, these are the people with the highest bpb stats (blogs per blogger) because they think that if they start a NEW blog, they'll write in that one more than they wrote in the old one. Sure you will, buddy.

Grocery List Blogs
These are the blogs in which people tell you things that 1) you did not need to know and b) were not even remotely curious about, such as their grocery list. I think they're trying to be reformed one post wonder bloggers. Feeling the pressure to blog, they post things like "Washed the dog today. Too tired to write anymore." I can only imagine, after writing that tome. You probably need a vacation.

Stream of Consciousness Blogs
These blogs can be quite interesting and are not categorized by their content so much as their author's tendency to write large posts that consistently are made up of run on sentences, leading you to wonder if they so much as took a breath between logging on and hitting the POST button, or if you will find them slumped over the keyboard from oxygen depravation, one leg twitching like a little yip yip dog anticipating the arrival of the new mailman, excited by the things that most people would be forced to admit is very, very mundane....rather than start a new sentence, they use the dot dot dot....a lot, you know?

That's the other neat category. Other. Please, keep your blogs in this category. (Actually, there are several more but I'm out of time....and you're tired of reading. My stat meter records yawns-per-post).

And speaking of other blogs, please hear me as I voice the deepest disappointment of my recent blogging career - the fact that no one (with the exception of my wife) caught my off hand shout out to Sabrina Duncan a few posts ago.

Folks, that obscure little blog pearl is what keeps you coming back
and I think you all missed it. I thought for sure he'd say something. Or this guy. Most of the rest are too young to have caught it I guess.

One more thing....looks like Al Gore is the new Tom Bodett.


Zack said...

whoa!! I've seriously always thought Al Gore sounded like the Motel 6 guy as well! 7 years ago I could be found telling this cheesy joke over and over, "I'm Al Gore, and I leave the internet on for ya!"

shawn blanc said...

What category would you put your site in?

And by the way; I seem to remember a post a while ago stating that you would never talk about blogging again...

chuck said...

I am sorry. I dropped the ball on that one. In all fairness though, I never really paid too much attention to Charlie and his angels. It came on as I was covering the cows in the carport. Now there's a chore no apartment dwelling Cali kid wants. It is right up there with scraping guanna from rocks and peeling strawberries.

I thought Al Gore was a weatherman.

reallyniceday said...

Does anyone know who Tom Bodett is besides midwestern radio listeners? I mean, I know he's a household hero in cheap motel land but really...? :)

ChriS & Yvette Ferguson said...

Zack...that is the funniest Al Gore!

Randy...I should've caught the Sabrina Duncan Charlie comment...I am totally ashamed!

Christine said...

I think I'm a stream of consciousness blogger who is trying ever-so-hard to get it into the other category. Sigh...

carl said...

What about people like me who (are about to) write comments that have nothing to do with the post but are to lazy to send an email (and want everyone to see that they are commenting)?

I watched the signs and wonders conference on Godtv yesterday and 2 things came to mind:

1 Are you the bald guy interviewed during the intermission?

2 That was the first time i ever heard (of) Misty Edwards. That extended "Its only a shadow" got me going! I found her website and was sorely disappointed that you would let someone that anointed have such an awful web presence. For Shame! You MUST do something about this!

Cathy said...

I actually caught your post to Sabrina Duncan, but did not comment....I guess that shows my age....though I didn't bother attempting the Farrah flip back then.

I met you last week in KC - Brian's sister, if you recall.

Randy Bohlender said...

Shawn - I'm not sure. Probably 'other'. And I probably did blog that about not blogging. I don't know. I don't read my own blog.

Tom Mills said...

Dude, I wrote the book on old and I have no idea - actually I do now - I googled her - but I had no idea who Sabrina Duncan was - is - what is the correct grammar on that one?