8.13.2006

The Signs of the Times


The following is a nearly word-for-word transcript of a conversation between a rapidly aging man and his uber-hip wife, as they dined on fine food at this exquisite establishment this afternoon.

HER: We need to buy you a beach hat. (They were about to leave for a most-expenses-paid, much needed family vacation.)

HIM: I know the hat I want. I have purchased the exact same hat twice before, in 2002 and 2004 before Burning Man. I always buy it at Walmart.
This causes uber-hip wife to begin laughing uproariously, which in turn encourages their three children to began to belly laugh as well.
HIM: What?!?!

HER: I'm sorry, but it's just that when you said that, you sounded like a really old man!!!

---
editors note: it was later discovered that Walmart no longer carries 'the hat'. The old man is not quite sure what he will do.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

I saw similar style ones on sale at Target yesterday... might help. :)

Jerry James said...

God is doing a new thing . . . time for a "different" new hat.

Alaska1 said...

I am thinking of a camo hat :)

Kelsey Bohlender said...

What he didn't mention is that he and the boys went to TWO Walmarts today in search of "the hat". I guess you gotta find you a better WalMart. Dawg.

Randy Bohlender said...

I'm going to write a letter to Walmart right now. On wide ruled paper, with a dull pencil. Then I'm taking my metamucil and hitting the sack.

Anonymous said...

Dude. Give up the hat, and don't forget your support stockings.

Anonymous said...

This looks equally eclectic:

http://www.getahaton.com/proddetail.php?prod=CSG841ST34.RDTP&cat=46

Randy Bohlender said...

Very nice, but Sam Walton's version was about eight bucks....

Anonymous said...

I have a ghetto cowboy sun hat you can borrow, but you have to wear it at the 10am tomorrow.

Tom Mills said...

I'd loan you my burning man hat, but the wind destroyed it! However, I think you can probably find something similar at the thrift store -- something your uber-hip wife will be proud of -- you know ... the way my wife was pround of me. And that "old man" comment...I'm pretty sure she wasn't referring to the wisdom of age with respect and adoration.

Randy Bohlender said...

Tom, I wouldn't wear that rice-patty hat if my shiney pate depended on it. As for your interpretation of Kelsey's "Old man" comment....uh, only an old man would interpret it that way. :-)