Spent some time early this morning reading Henri Nouwen's Clowning in Rome. Henri points out my faults with annoying regularity...so much so that I can only read a few pages of his writing without putting it away for a while. I won't bother quoting him here, because I'd need to quote too much...he sort of dryly works up to the zingers. The zingers don't stand on their own, but they sure do well when supported by his ramp-up. Suffice it to say that in reading five or ten pages this morning, I realized:
1) I live in chronos time, not kairos. Chronos is regulated by what comes next...a timeline where progress is only measured by distance from prior and coming events. You're never really 'there' - you're always not quite there. Kairos is a resting in the moment and the presence of God. No moment is wasted, and even the painful ones carry meaning.
2) I regard people as interesting characters rather than valuable souls. The folly in that is that once they no longer hold my interest, I struggle to fake it...when they're really valuable to God.
I don't like this book very much.