The project sounded simple enough....

Jackson came home from the 4th grade the other day with an announcement of a school project...each 4th grader was to build a car made entirely out of food for a big race aptly called "the Food Car Race". I'm not sure what they're learning in this, except preparedness for coming days when Saddam torches the oil fields and we're all left trying to run our SUV's on salad oil.

The original plan (his) was to use large pretzel sticks as axles, oreos as wheels, and a loaf of bread as a car body. It would have worked, except that the bread tore, and the cookies crumbled, so to speak. Today sent us back to Kroger in pursuit of parts for the Food Race 500 Gumdrop Rice Cake Cheverolet. We wandered Krogers for an hour, laughing our heads off at the bad ideas we conjured up...like "the food car, powered by beans". Sound juvenile? It is. The boy is ten. Nothing is more fun than laughing with your ten year old, no matter what the occassion.

After much searching and spending less than it costs to sponsor a car on the Winston Cup Circuit, we had our supplies. We went home and began to work. We had Rice Cake wheels, small pretzel stick axles, graham crackers for the body, frosting for bondo, and the most adhesive element known to the grocery world, bubble gum. I also swung by the candle aisle and grabbed a few 'secret ingredients'. We learned the following:

1. You can, in fact, use a Black and Decker power drill to drill a fine hole into a gumdrop, thereby allowing it to convert a pretzel stick into a spindle. You then add a gummy coin bushing (also drilled), sliding it onto the spindle up snug near the wheel.

2. Rice cake wheels don't work. Too flimsy. We commissioned the fabrication shop (mom) to bake us some rock hard dough wheels 2 inches in diameter and 3/4 of an inch think, then drilled them ourselves, inserting them onto the spindle with a margerine wheel bearing.

3. Bubble gum holds all. Very well. I'm adding it to the duct tape and plastic sheeting in my Days to Come Survival Kit.

We're about 2/3 done with the project...had to stop after installing the wheels. We now have a body on a rolling chasis...tomorrow, it goes to the frosting/paint shop.

In other news...
I picked up my ebaynium. Purchased an '89 Isuzu Trooper from a nice fellow in Wilmington. Great price...engine and running gear is strong...aesthetically challenged, to be sure, but I've found that is a plus in 4WD trucks. I'd NEVER take Kelsey's Montero off the road...it's too pretty. Now THIS old truck will see some dirt....

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